An ongoing issue many face in the aftermath of infidelity is when the affair partner keeps reaching out.
This scenario often leaves the person entangled between past feelings and the desire to move forward.
Such a situation tends to spark a whirlwind of emotions from guilt to anger and confusion.
Plus it can potentially jeopardize the process of healing and reconciliation in existing relationships if they’ve chosen to mend fences.
While the temptation to re-engage with an affair partner might persist maintaining boundaries and firmly moving towards no contact can often be a tough but instrumental part of the solution.
It’s a course of action that requires a steady commitment resilience and sometimes the assistance of professionals such as therapists or support groups.
But how do you consistently withhold from surrendering to the pull and what if the affair partner acts like nothing happened?
Affair Partner Still Reaching Out
Your affair partner reaching out can be confusing particularly when you’ve decided to do what’s right and break it off. Moving on involves blocking them completely making empathetic attempts to rebuild trust in your marriage and avoiding falling for their acts of seeming ‘connection’ like ‘drunk texts’ and flattery.
Deep down you might find it difficult to completely cut off particularly when you’re still ’emotionally connected.’ However separate from your emotions consider engaging in ‘friend sessions’ which might help.
Here NC (No Contact) becomes your tool towards breaking off from the ongoing contact.
While it might occasionally sting to bump into them at work or social platforms resist those addiction-like cycles of reconnecting. Remember closure usually springs from within not from the affair partner confessing or apologizing.
- Block all communication channels.
- Engage in ‘friend sessions’ to help cope.
- Resist rekindling the relationship no matter the ex-partner’s approach.
To avoid any relapse into the affair it’s important to maintain boundaries and mindfully start ignoring their messages. It could be self-worth affirming letters suggestive pictures or emails meant to bait you back – learn to distance yourself and move on.
Emotional Connection With Affair Partner
Does an emotional connection make the affair more difficult to end? Yes it does.
The length of the affair partner still reaching out indicates an emotional connection and revealing your attachment style to them. An emotional connection is not just about hooking up or having physical intimacy; it’s much more penetrating.
Repeated long calls messaging and having each other’s back creates a ‘mind/body love affair’ making it harder to part ways and return to the spouse. Developing feelings for an affair partner is one of the most disruptive side effects of maintaining ongoing contact.
However it’s important to understand that even if you have an emotional tie engaging in such serious affairs indicates issues that are hard to handle. Holding hands flirty looks and constant infatuation are intoxicating but can lead to an unforgettable regret.
- Remain mindful that an emotional connection greatly complicates the affair.
- Acknowledge the disruptive side effects of maintaining contact.
- Remember that serious affairs can lead to long-term regret.
‘Do it’ might be the reaction you got when you fell for her passionate approach but remember all the secret messaging monthly drunk text exchanges or any other commitment to each other only deepens the emotional attachment to an affair partner.
Signs Of A Serious Affair
When the affair partner keeps reaching out it might indicate a serious affair. But how do you determine it?
Here are some of the possible signs.
- Continuous return: If they keep reaching out despite calling it off it probably suggests deep emotions and attachment styles involved.
- Communication frequency: Increased communication be it emails texts or long calls can indicate a deep connection.
- Activities together: Regular meet-ups or appearances at events together might imply a full-blown relationship.
- Taking photos: Shared and kept photos confirm a strong bond between the affair partners. Such acts like nothing happened shows the affair’s seriousness.
Lack Of Remorse After The Affair
The actions and attitude of an affair partner post-affair can reveal much. If they lack remorse it’s quite worrying and disruptive.
- Deflection of Responsibility: They dismiss their mistakes and are often defensive when confronted regularly bickering and getting irritable.
- Faking Empathy: This entails expressing regret but their deeds don’t correspond. For example they may apologize yet continue reaching out or start ignoring the feelings of the wronged partner.
- Continuous contact: Despite getting caught they continue making contact which indicates feelings for the affair partner with a lack of empathy for the spouse.
- Dishonesty: Cheaters who keep professing love while still carrying out an affair reveal a lack of genuine remorse for the actions.
Dealing With The Fallout Of The Affair
When the affair partner keeps reaching out it can be emotionally disruptive and challenging to navigate.
This behavior might indicate that the affair partner is seeking closure or could be an insight into their attachment style.
Often it’s the aftermath of the affair which causes most pain burdening the betrayed spouse with feelings of insecurity and mistrust.
In such a situation maintaining boundaries can feel particularly difficult especially when the affair partner acts as if nothing happened or uses methods like drunk texting to make contact.
It’s important to address the addiction-like cycle of such behavior and understand that these actions might reflect the affair partner’s insecurities or their need for reassurance.
The affair might have ended but continuous return might suggest deep unresolved issues on both sides.
If the affair partner decides to do what’s right like confessing or apologizing this might be a step towards cutting off the affair and focusing more towards healing the marriage.
However things can get complicated when explicit messages or even photos are involved leading to more distress for the spouse and adding to the marital discord.
How To Protect Yourself?
In such scenarios it might be necessary to explore avenues like obtaining a restraining order to protect oneself from further harm.
Remember it’s essential to maintain a ‘no contact’ policy to effectively deal with the effects of an affair.
Finding professional support like therapy or attending friend sessions can be instrumental in dealing with the fallout and starting the journey of self-love after such a distressing situation.
Ultimately the goal should be to restore trust rebuild the relationship with the spouse and let go of the affair even if it means ending a connection that once seemed meaningful.
This may require changing your attitude cutting off the affair partner and seeking help from friends or professionals to navigate the complex emotions.
Overcoming infidelity is not easy. However with time patience commitment and guided support healing is possible.